It’s unbelievably how far supplement companies (companies in general, but I’m going to bag on supplement companies in this post) go to avoid having any negative reviews toward their products.

The supplement business in fitness is huge. I’m not going to crunch numbers, but the amount of money poured into things like vitamins, minerals, herbs, protein powders, preworkouts and all that shit is astrofuckingnomical.

There’s only a few worthwhile supplements (vitamins and minerals-wise) on the market that are worth a damn: fish oil, vitamin D3, vitamin K2, zinc picolinate and chelated magnesium. Outside of that, there may be a few anomalies that are worth a shit for select people, but the aforementioned supplements are rockstars in my book.

I’ve been a caffeine junkie since March 28, 2009. That was back when I was staying up late every single night. I’ll always enjoy caffeine. I’ve taken breaks from it, but I always return. In the process, I’ve been an energy drink (mainly the low/no-carb variety) connoisseur. Started off with Monster Lo-Carb during most of 2009, and today I usually stick with BANG energy, SPIKE energy and VPX Redline when I’m not drinking coffee or taking ProLab’s 200mg caffeine pills.

When I heard about MusclePharm dropping their line of energy drinks, I got excited! Naturally, of course. “What are they gonna add to the table?!” I asked myself, with BANG energy and SPIKE energy offering the best bang for your buck in terms of what you get in their drinks, from creatine, glutamine, BCAAs, CoQ10 and 300mg of caffeine in VPX’s BANG energy to yohimbe, L-tyrosine, a shithorde of the most bioavailable form of vitamin b12 (methylcobalamin) and 300mg of caffeine in SPIKE energy, I wanted to know what MusclePharm was gonna bring to the table.

I liked MusclePharm. Truly so. Shred Matrix is pretty decent. Battlefuel XT is a solid product. The latest “Arnold Iron Cuts” was OK. But all in all, I thought they were a pretty good supplement company.

Enter their new energy drinks Energy Sport and Energy Sport Zero.

120mg of caffeine, the nonabsorbable cyanocobalamin version of vitamin b12 along with ingredients that mirror every single Monster, Redbull, Rockstar, Nos, etc. mainstream energy drink that’s on the market. Oh, and MusclePharm upcharges for their energy drinks, despite the ingredient panel mirroring exactly what the aforementioned products have.

But wait, MusclePharm adds something new to the table, guys and gals!

Beta-Alanine.

One ingredient. That’s it. That’s the only thing new they add to the table.

You can go out, buy capsules of beta-alanine, and stack them with a mainstream energy drink or superior energy drinks like VPX’s BANG energy or SPIKE energy, and you’ll be getting a bigger bang for your buck.

MusclePharm, your energy drinks are subpar. Not to mention you simpletons only added 120mg of caffeine to your drinks. What a joke. You buffoons were even too cheap and lazy to add the highest bioavailable form of vitamin b12 — again: methylcobalamin.

Here’s the biggest reason I’m bashing MusclePharm: their shoddy, robotic shills that are their customer service representatives are doing everything they possibly can to remove negative reviews from the internet.

On the god awful, piece of shit supplement peddling website Muscle & Strength, I posted two reviews — one deleted right after the other — with my honest take on MusclePharm’s energy drinks. They were deleted. I sent M&S customer service (which claimed to dish out “speedy replies!”) and received no reply despite a respectful and polite inquiry.

I posted a review on bodybuilding.com and was subsequently banned.

My Amazon reviews of this low quality product have received similar fate.

Hmm…

MusclePharm, you were so desperate to join the energy drink world with the least amount of effort or ingenuity possible, so you threw together a subpar energy drink knowing full well that your sheepish fanbase would be suckered into paying an upcharge for it due to the name on the cans. My review of your awful drinks has received a high amount of views, and I can only hope that more and more people will open their eyes and see how garbage this product is

MusclePharm, fuck you and fuck your shitty energy drinks. Try to aspire to be more creative and crafty like BANG energy or SPIKE energy.

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