They are awful, terrible, unoriginal, trash, useless, unimaginative… garbage.
I’ve used a couple of MusclePharm products: Assault is a pretty good preworkout supplement. Battle Fuel XT is formidable. Shred Matrix isn’t half bad.
Yesterday, April Fools Day, MusclePharm released their brand new energy drink line: Energy Sport and Energy Sport Zero. I didn’t look up anything about these drinks. I figured, coming from a supplement company with health in mind, they’d be alright, and so I didn’t do my due diligence in researching the product. Yeah, whoever even buys one can of this is a fool, so well played on releasing this new line on April Fools Day, MP!
Y’know, before I continue, I just want to say that MusclePharm’s sponsored athletes speak for themselves: their head honcho ‘sponsored athlete’ that I see featured the most is San Francisco 49ers’ quarterback Colon Crappershit… I mean Colin Kaepernick! I digress.
The regular Sport Energy from MusclePharm? 39 grams of sugar, only 120mg of caffeine, and the ingredients mirror what you’d find in a typical Redbull, Monster, Rockstar or Nos. The only difference is the inclusion of beta alanine. Whoop-de-fucking-do. There’s nothing special about this drink. “But Troy! What about the zero sugar version?!” Who gives a shit? It still only has 120mg of caffeine and only brings beta alanine to the table. The promotion around here is that you buy 2 for $4.98. What a ripoff.
Step your game up, MusclePharm. These drinks are molecular structured garbage. Veritable dogshit.
The two best energy drinks on the market right now are SPIKE energy and VPX’s BANG. Both are imaginative, creative, crafty and bring something new to the table.
SPIKE has been around for years! From SPIKE Shooter (8.4 ounces) to SPIKE Shotgun (16 ounces), the Shooter features 300mg of caffeine while the Shotgun wields 350mg. I prefer SPIKE Shooter, between the two, as it’s just a quick dose of l-tyrosine, yohimbe and a high level of the most bioavailable version of vitamin b12… methylcobalamin, speaking of which MusclePharm Energy Sport only features the low-bioavailable cyanocobalamin form of b12. How despicable. MusclePharm was too cheap to put any work or money into their shitty energy drink line, which is going to fail because it literally brings nothing else to the table outside of beta alanine.
VPX is a top notch company. Jack Owoc is one hell of a CEO. He connects with consumers, listens to what they want, is a faithful family man and he knows how to run a damn company. Hats off to him for what he’s done with VPX. The only thing I’ve disliked that he’s done, in terms of business related decision making, is reformulating Redline after a horde of dipshits were misusing the product back in early 2010. Speaking of Redline, it has beta alanine and a host of other worthwhile features/stimulants to boot, unlike the one-dimensional shitshow that is MusclePharm Energy Sport and Energy Sport Zero.
Anyhow, VPX BANG is the best energy drink out there, currently. With 300mg of caffeine in a 16 ounce can in five different flavors (fruit punch, blue razz, champagne, lemon drop and the brand new kickass Star Blast (‘kickass’ isn’t a part of the name)), the drink features its own patented creatine, glutamine, CoQ10 and some BCAAs (branched chained amino acids).
What the fuck new or innovative does MusclePharm Energy Sport bring to the table? It sounds to me that MusclePharm desperately wanted to join the energy drink game but was too lazy to concoct anything interesting, imaginative or revolutionary as opposed to what SPIKE has done or what Jack Owoc is doing with the boys and girls at VPX Sports. That’s lazy and terrible business ethics. This has essentially turned MusclePharm into a shoddy supplement company.
The bottom line? Check out VPX BANG and SPIKE energy.
MusclePharm, you blew it.