The first bit of good news: UFC light heavyweight champion Jon Jones posted, “It’s on!” on Twitter, and directly after it was announced by the UFC that the rematch with Alexander Gustafsson will occur in Toronto on September 27th — good stuff! The detractors can finally shut the hell up about Jones ‘ducking’ Gustafsson. I’ll cover that at a later point. Nice to see that out of the way.

The second: Despite 23 turnovers, the San Antonio Spurs just defeated the Miami Heat 110-95 in game one of the NBA Finals. Now, the ill-advised idiots of the sports world (read: simple-minded sports fans and shortsighted Miami Heat fans) will blame LeBron James’ absence in the final five minutes of the game (cramps from the excessive heat… ah, piss poor pun not intended) for the Heat’s loss, but let’s be real — the Spurs are fully capable of beating the Heat even if they wield an active LeBron; they were just seconds away from the title last year before that jackass Ray Allen knocked down an overtime-forcing 3-pointer in game six.

Manu Ginobili exploded in the first half and Danny Green came alive in the second. Outside of the turnovers, it was a gorgeous display of Spurs’ basketball — a lot of ball movement and quality shot selection.

Y’know, LeBron James exiting the game is a rough card to be dealt — it happens. I have a few jokes to make about his ‘cramps’, but I’ll resist from posting them on here. I’ve been a LeBron fan from day one since his debut as a Cleveland Cavalier against the Sacramento Kings. I’m not too bitter about he and the Heat ousting my Celtics in 2011 and 2012 and the skimping by the Spurs last year (might be lying about the latter) since the Spurs beat him and the Cavs in the 2007 Finals and the Celtics beat him and the Cavs in 2008 and 2010.

Still yet, if Michael Jordan watched the game, he probably had to shake his head and cringe at the bitchblood properties that LeBron displayed at the end of the game. Tim Duncan is 38-years-old and was hauling ass right till the end!

Everybody kept whining about the (literal) heat in the building. Somewhere, some place, the Celtics of old had to be rolling their eyes. I can imagine Larry Bird just smirking and eloquently saying out loud, “Fuckin’ pussies.”

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