The Los Angeles Lakers racked up their 15th title on Sunday night. Congratulations. I’ve had to take a few days to get the vomit out of my system, and, because I’m Troy Sparks, I would like to take the time to bash the Lakers really quick before I toss out some really freakin’ ornery props toward them. Eh, so the Lakers are now touted as being once again two titles behind the Celtics (yet the Lakers are 2-9 all time against the greatest NBA franchise to ever lace ’em up), yet I say we remove five of their titles. The five I’m talking about are the ones that they won in Minneapolis. Yes, that’s right. The ratio should be 10:17 instead of 15:17. Nobody says that the Cleveland Browns have a championship from the Baltimore Ravens’ Super Bowl victory in 2001, do they? I mean, the ‘Ravens’ were touted as being the ‘original Browns’, right? So leave the five titles to the Minneapolis Lakers and give the ten others to the Los Angeles Lakers. It’s only fair.
Kobe Bryant finally did it. No longer riding on Shaquille O’Neal’s coattails, proving the doubters wrong, making everybody in the world and those watching from outer space believe that he’s such an enthralling leader, all of that crap, yaddee-yaddee-yah. Yep. Yeah. Yes. Congratulations, Kobe. I’m not going to sit here and bore the hell out of everybody reading this with a bunch of verbose bullshit negating anything that Kobe’s did, but KOBE (yes, I’m speakin’ to ya, bro), why did you do that fake ass, premeditated, jackass-esque Michael Jordan-over-Craig Ehlo-wannabe fist pump!?!?! WHY!?!??!?! Damn it!
I’m not going to bloviate about the NBA Finals. It’s late Wednesday morning, and the Finals finished up three nights ago. You know everything about the games and the ending. So if I need to tell you how it ended or break down any stats, then you are in the wrong place (and apparently the wrong mind).
Pau Gasol was the real MVP of this series. While Kobe thrived in a couple of games, keep in mind that he had a few subpar games and failed to live up to his ‘Closer’ appellation by not being able to close out game three, having a mediocre second half. Gasol never had a bad game. He stood tall in every game. Proved all the doubters wrong (yes, I was a DOUBTER), played physical basketball, took it to the Magic, shot face up jumper after face up jumper against the lost-minded Orlando Magic, took hook shots to the basket, and all in between, played the best defense I’ve ever seen the man play.
So, yeah, yeah, congratulations Lakers.
However, the true victories are the ones you win through the Boston Celtics.
I also have no doubt in my mind that if Kevin Garnett and Leon Powe were healthy (at least Garnett), the Celtics would be racking up number eightteen right now. And yes, that is my bisaed Boston Celtics fan-mind speaking. Thank you very much.